53 Simple Ways to Feel More Feminine
I’ve made a list of 53 things I believe can help you feel more feminine. Some are unique, others are more like simple reminders;) Not all will apply to or appeal to you, and that’s fine. This list is like a buffet, where you pick what looks good and try them:) Also, some don’t seem to relate to femininity directly, but to general self-improvement; this is because femininity goes far beyond what you wear or how you act. True femininity equally consists of having a good character and a beautiful heart.
1. Update your plain chap stick to lip gloss or chap stick that’s tinted, glossy, shimmery, plumping (if it has peppermint oil it’s actually naturally plumping, as peppermint oil invigorates blood flow), and/or has a nice smell.
2. Stop swearing.
3. Cook or bake something delicious for someone/others (not just for yourself) :) And not just anything, like macaroni & cheese, but something a little challenging!
4. Try a long, wavy hairdo.
5. Wear more feminine colors, like pink or lavender; feminine colors are any colors guys usually avoid.
6. Try a cosmetic product you usually don’t use – if you never wear lipstick, try it! If you usually don’t wear blush, put some on! Curl your lashes, define your brows, try liquid liner, whatever is new or unusual. Sometimes the simplest things make the biggest difference, and you may fall in love with a new discovery.
7. Wear a skirt, dress, or heels.
8. If you’re tired, take a nap for goodness’ sake!
9. Stop wearing unfitted, unisex t-shirts or any unisex clothing. Especially baggy sweatpants.
10. If you wear your hair up all the time, try wearing it down.
11. If you wear glasses all the time, try switching to contacts. Paired with made-up eyes, you can feel really pretty.
12. Hang out with girly girl friends instead of guy friends who treat you like “one of the guys.” Do girly things like shop at the mall or have long talks. If you don’t have many girl friends – MAKE SOME! This isn’t to say hanging out with guys takes away your femininity; it depends on what KIND of guys, whether they’re the kind who treat women like ladies, or women like they’re sex objects, the “lesser” sex, or other horrendous things.
13. Spray on cinnamon/vanilla scents. These are supposedly the most attractive scents to guys; they associate these smells with “love.”
14. Wear girly/sexy bras and underwear. Even if no one else sees them, you can feel more girly (and mysterious, as if you have a delicious secret:)).
15. Wear jewelry and accessories. Replace fake pearl jewelry with real ones!
16. Replace sneakers with cute boots or flats. These can be just as comfortable and much more feminine.
17. Generously and sincerely compliment people. Learn what “kinds” of compliments really make men feel good, and what kinds make women feel good – become a professional at making people feel really, really good!
18. Be polite. Say things like, “Thank you,” “Excuse me,” “Have a nice day.”
19. Stop picking your skin – cuticles, pimples, dry lips, etc.
20. Display positive, friendly body language. Keep your hands open instead of balling them into fists, keep arms apart instead of crossing them, smile, make eye contact, breathe slowly and deeply whenever you start to stress, laugh, stop tapping/fidgeting/twitching/scratching, etc.
21. Don’t share vulgar or dirty humor.
22. Wear clothes that have frills, lace, bows/ribbon, gathers, or ruffles.
23. Walk around with a book on your head to improve posture:)
24. Use shampoo and conditioner with a really strong, feminine smell so that your hair smells irresistible, especially when damp (I’ve heard guys like when a woman’s hair smells good over a girl who just smells good because of perfume).
25. Sit somewhere comfy with a blanket and some hot tea, and read a good book:)
26. Play some really girly songs and sing and dance to them! Have fun and let loose!
27. Be “housewife-ish.” Clean your room. Do the dishes, the laundry. Tidy up the living room. Put some flowers on a table. You will feel a little more respect for yourself, and anyone you live with will appreciate you.
28. Learn HOW to put on makeup so you look and feel good. Especially perfect the “natural” look, as this is the one you should most use, and which men generally like best. Youtube videos are a great place to start, and from there, just experiment. It’s an art, you won’t perfect it in a day.
29. Redecorate your room so it looks feminine.
30. Buy some real, pretty plants or flowers to place around the home and take care of them. Studies have even shown that plants in a living environment can raise your happiness level.
31. In the shower, use your hands instead of a loofah to wash your body. Maybe it sounds weird, but this helps me get in touch with my body. It’s a gentle reminder that my body is alive, beautiful, and working hard to take care of me.:)
32. If you are looking for a new job, get one where you will be encouraged to dress well and stylishly, and where you will be surrounded by lots of other women. Also, the more feminine the industry the better – clothing, cosmetics, crafts, etc. Avoid fast food restaurants, any place that requires significant physical work, and any place where you’re basically allowed to wear whatever you want (and where you notice the employees take advantage of this – by practically wearing pajamas!). This basically applies to young women who just need to work while they’re studying for their degree, etc. Office jobs can be good too, because you’re usually encouraged to look professional. Just be careful not to look too stiff or serious, and instead, wear clothing that’s feminine AND professional. If you normally wear pant suits to work, try skirt suits.
33. Watch how you talk. If you talk fast, slow down. If you mumble, speak clearly. If you use a low voice, practice using your head voice. If you talk too much, listen more! If people can barely hear you, speak up.
34. Watch a good chick flick. Cry when there’s a sad scene! Express your happiness when something cute and romantic happens!
35. Next time you pass by a pet store, go inside! Look at the cute puppies and animals and let yourself go ga-ga over them.
36. STOP gossiping, criticizing, and complaining. Whenever you feel the urge to, just KEEP SILENT. It might be hard, but it’s worth it. Start seeing the good in people and in your life instead; there’s no need to have give and take with ugliness. It will not make you a better person. And, if people associate you with negativity, they won’t want to be around you; they might even be scared to get to know you, and you, them.
37. Get some girly pajamas. Try to avoid pants and a top, unless the pattern, material, design, etc. is very feminine. I highly recommend night gowns. If you’re married, the sexier the better!
38. Drop cynicism – cynical sarcasm, jokes, comments.
39. Hum.
40. Replace gum with something like Ice Breakers or Altoids; chewing gum looks unattractive. If you’re extremely attached to gum, switching to a cinnamon gum is a bit of a step up for two reasons: men love the smell of cinnamon (they associate it with love) AND it actually makes your breath fresher by killing the bacteria in your mouth instead of just covering it up.
41. Shave your legs, even in the winter when you don’t “have” to.
42. Don’t depend on showing lots of skin, cleavage, etc. to get attention as a woman. Focus on your aura, attitude, the way you hold yourself, and the style of your clothes instead.
43. Take a long, hot bath by candlelight and soothing music. There are many things you can put in your bath to feel feminine, such as essential oils, sweet-smelling bubble bath solution, rose petals, epsom salt (relaxes muscles, can be bought cheap at Walmart), and there are lots of products made especially for baths (I especially recommend Burt’s Bees and Bath & Body Works)
44. Wear earrings every day, even if they’re just studs.
45. Take smaller bites. Chew more slowly.
46. Spend time with really cute little kids. Especially happy little girls who LOVE BEING girly, and have no shame immersing themselves in girly things and activities – Barbies, Disney princesses, dress-up, pink, singing, baby animals, glitter, twirling around in frilly skirts, etc.
47. Keep a diary. Diaries help you get in touch with your emotions and clear your mind. My brother just shared with me that he thinks it’s cute when girls write in diaries.
48. Donate to a charity or cause that helps those for whom your heart is sincerely concerned. Or even better, volunteer your time. Charity is an essential trait in a truly feminine woman.
49. If you smoke, try to avoid smoking in front of men. Of course, quitting is the best choice but isn’t exactly “simple.” For my brother, smoking is THE most unattractive thing women do.
50. If you’re normal, you probably almost daily see and interact with people outside your home. So, wear makeup daily! Even if it’s just enough for you to be able to look in the mirror and not think, “I look so ______ (ugly, plain, scary, old, tired, you fill in the blank).”
51. Wear nail polish 24-7, even if it’s just clear or cream-colored. Rich, red nail polish is especially sexy & feminine for fancy occassions.
52. Don’t listen to rap, heavy metal, screamo, or anything of the like. Even rock is unfeminine; it’s fine to like, but shouldn’t be the only thing you listen to.
53. Read Fascinating Womanhood by Helen Andelin and learn the core principles of true femininity.
Hope this helps in your exciting, healing journey to becoming a beautiful, feminine woman!
Here is a testimony I found online of a girl who determined to become girly and reached her goal in 1 month! You go girl!
Link: Look more girly
“To me, being a female is an honor. I feel blessed (not saying that being a male is terrible, and you shouldn’t feel blessed if you are one), and I have a lot of fun playing my feminine role. Make-up, clothing, boys and and other stuff is fun, but it is just a surface part of it. I want to FEEL like a woman. I want to embrace the power, that we, as women have. Being beautiful, strong, powerful, and still a gentle female is what I want to live my life by.” -wearegalaxies
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This is a fantastic list:) I really like your blog! Being new I find it sad to hear about the virus, i am sure i would have enjoyed your other posts as well – it is so nice to learn there are like-minded girls out there, even if they are rare:)
Hello! I just got to your site from Renee’s “The feminine woman” and I can say it’s a very beautiful place here. :} You have some good ideas here in this list. Though I personally find some of them too stereotypical. For me an issue is that apparently for being feminine you have to buy buy buy – that’s what the advertisements and media in general tell us: It’s not okay to be natural; you have to buy tons of cosmetic products, acessories and more clothes than you really need! This is not required so much from men in order to be masculine. I like the idea of having a graceful feminine spirit and behaviour, but not the idea that femininity is something you can/should buy. Thanks to the advertisements a lot of us believe that there is something wrong with the way we look naturally and that we can look good only if we paint our face with chemicals. Why is it that we fell into this trap? while most of men never think that they need to apply cosmetics in order to be acceptable to the world.
Ms Summer, thank you! I’m really glad you enjoyed it:)
Luci, thank you for that compliment! And yes, some of the ideas, I guess, are “stereotypical”, but I wanted to include them as a reminder. And, I totally agree about how our culture makes us think we can just buy femininity and beauty. I’m really sad to hear you felt I was encouraging this mindset, because really, I don’t. The thing is, though I grew up in America, I was raised very conservatively. I was never encouraged to look pretty, wear makeup, nail polish, anything like that. In fact, it could be so extreme that looking like a BOY was ENCOURAGED because it helped guys not be tempted!! Which I now see as quite horrible. But anyway, though I’m grateful for THIS extreme versus the extreme of relying on looks/products/clothes to feel good, as I got older I allowed myself these things little by little and they’ve helped me gain confidence in my identity as a WOMAN. So I totally understand if some of these points really don’t work for you, or help YOU become more feminine, but I know for some women they really will. But yes, thank you so much for your input, I think a lot of women need to hear it!!
So to clarify: Ladies, A FEMININE, GRACEFUL SPIRIT is MUCH MORE IMPORTANT than ANYTHING EXTERNAL! Just keep this your priority, and probably other things won’t take over unnecessarily;) This list, really, is just a START for women who don’t feel very feminine and need a little help.